A few weeks ago, my husband and I drove our daughter,
Amanda, to college...from the midwest to the east coast. In her 18 years of life, I don't think she has ever been gone more than one week at a time. Now she is 950 miles away. So, this is new for Joe and I...and also for Amanda.
Move-in went very smoothly. Being organized ahead of time helped tremendously. Her dorm room looks adorable and fit everything we packed, she has the best roommate ever (a sweet young lady from western New York), all the staff and students were helpful and friendly, and it was an overall joyful experience.
But, this major change definitely takes getting used to. It's strange that it's just my husband and me for dinner now...it was bittersweet not setting out that third place setting.
It was odd not seeing Amanda's makeup displayed on the bathroom counter (or the occasional towel thrown on the bathroom floor). Her bed is constantly perfectly made...lined up with her favorite stuffed animals that she has had for years. Amanda's car is in the garage all the time...we'll have to take it out for a drive
soon.
Now, our conversations aren't face-to-face in person, but Facetime these days sure makes the distance easier. I had a long conversation with her yesterday. No, it's not like having
her in the living room, but it's something. At least I get to see her while I'm talking to her.
I already know it's going to be especially difficult when she's feeling under-the-weather and
I can't cook her a pot of chicken soup...or when I can't give her a hug when she's feeling blue.
For Amanda, it's very different too. For one, she has no air conditioning. The freshman
dorms have been hot. She has two fans, but it's not quite the same as the cooler air at home.
The public showers have been a huge difference for her. She has to bring everything she needs
(including her dorm key) and walk down the hall, wear her Crocs to protect her feet, hang a towel outside the shower door to cover herself, and get dressed in a public setting. She's a reserved person, so if there's anything she's not too happy about, it's this.
She is eating well, but not getting those comforting home-cooked meals.
She misses Buddy dearly, our 8-year old
family rabbit.
She'll have to travel by herself when she comes home for the holidays and summer.
Plus, she is learning where all the buildings on campus are located, how to use the dining services, meeting all of her new professors, figuring out how to apply for a campus job...I could go on and on.
There is a whole lot of new when you're in a new city, in a new school, surrounded by new people, and living in an entirely new way.
But nearly two weeks after move-in now, we're all getting used to these changes and accepting them.
1. For one, time helps. You just start getting used to the newness after awhile. It becomes part of everyday life.
2. I've also found that making new outlets helps. I've found myself with a bit of extra time, so I am doing some new things. This morning I taught my very first Silver Sneakers Yoga class in my local YMCA. It was fun and helped me connect with my class...and myself.
My husband and I started watching the TV series, Bridgerton. So, that's something new for us to enjoy together.
I can now dedicate more time and attention to my organizing business. Stay tuned for some fun organizing newness ahead!
Amanda called me last night. She's getting used to dorm life, making so many new friends, getting into her new schoolwork, homework, laundry, eating, etc. routine.
3. Finally, planning helps. Joe and I already have our plane tickets to visit Amanda for a 3-day family weekend at her school. Amanda has plane tickets to come home for Thanksgiving, as well as Christmas break.
So we will see her three times...once in October, once in November, and for a long visit in December/January.
Transition is a bit easier when done in stages. In the years ahead, she'll be out of college...maybe in graduate school, perhaps working in another state, or married, or with kids of her own.
But for now, we're just walking through these changes one day at a time, one step at a time.
As the colors of fall emerge, they remind us that change
is inevitable. But it's also important to remember that there is joy available for the taking during these times of change, and something to be thankful for in every season ahead.
